How I used nature to overcome my fear of uncertainty.
As I sat swinging in my brand new (anthropologie knock-off) hammock, I looked up at the 50-foot tree… its lush leaves swaying above me, closed my eyes and noticed how weirdly unsafe I felt.
“What the fork Spense? You’re on a hammock. You’re supposed to be relaxed. In fact, why are you not napping?” I thought to myself.
My body was tight, arms crossed, neck was straight and super stiff.
So I went inward and asked my (oh-so-charming) monkey mind why I was in defence mode against this lovely moment.
“Well what if a bird decides to land on you and poops all over you?”
“What if a tornado passes through?”
“What if a worm drops into your ear?”
Super charming right?!
My monkey mind didn’t like this moment because it was unpredictable.
All the “what-if’s” were just too much to handle.
And it got me thinking that nature itself is unpredictable. It’s one of those things that you really can’t control.
At it’s core, fertility is all about nature.
A seed is planted and then watered. There’s nothing more natural than that.
And so by discovering your own unique relationship with nature, you’re able to see how you can begin to support nature to work in your favor and help you to create a healthy baby.
It helps to know that there’s a little voice inside of you that I like to call the monkey mind that will almost always protest you living outside of your comfort zone and loves to keep you small.
Your monkey minds loves:
A controlled environment. Naps are taken inside, free of creepy crawlies and precipitation
Certainty. Surprises? Unplanned? I dare you.
Security. Thinks in terms of life or death. Full of “what if’s” to keep you in fight or flight.
Time. Runs a tight ship to ensure optimal production.
As you can see, nature doesn’t fit inside the monkey-minds ideal world.
Then there’s another part of you. The real you. That one that’s always pointing you towards your destiny. I like to call this your spirit. Your spirits been there for you for lifetimes. It knows you. And it loves to help you grow and evolve to make all your dreams come true.
Your spirit loves:
A new environment. It encourages you to live outside of your comfort zone. Give napping outside a try. Birds, rain and worms are welcome because they ain’t gonna kill you.
Uncertainty. Because fun and spontaneity exist in the unplanned present moment.
Vulnerability. Heart is open and knows that control is a false sense of security because life is always changing.
No time-zone. Often loses track of time doing what it loves.
All of these, characteristics of nature. (Therefore, characteristics of fertility.)
Although you need aspects of your monkey-mind to operate in our world (like put clothes on in the morning) it’s important to ask yourself these kind of questions:
Who is leading my fertility journey, my monkey mind or my spirit?
Am I making decisions based on fear and lack or love and enoughness?
Do I need to connect with my spirit on a daily basis by doing things like connecting with nature?
I did end up taking a cat nap outside. While I did, I felt myself become one with nature. I marvelled in how amazing birds are, watched the clouds move and I even saw a wiggly worm moving down the tree (law of attraction anyone?).
It was a reminder that life is so beautiful. And that it's only your fears that block you from seeing what is really there.
"Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better." - Albert Einstein.